I’m not really a celebrator of religious holidays but I wonder how that will change once a munchkin is in the picture. Will we start going to worship services on the big holidays? Will we talk about little baby jesus and the blessings that he brought? What about his resurrection? Are these things requirements to be a good parent? I don’t believe in it and it feels wrong to fake it so that my children are exposed to it. I suppose if we stay where we are for a long time, I’d bring my kids to this church that I work for. I don’t know though. It’s a lot to think about, right? I have a great friend who was very church going and then got pregnant and never went back to church. It was too much work to get a baby up and go to church on a weekly basis. That would probably be me. We’d never make it to church until the kid was 10 years old. ha ha. So, that gives us 11 years to plan out what kind of church and what we religious stuff we want the munchkin exposed to. I suppose I should stop worrying about it for a little while, yes?
Dec 26th will be the one year anniversary of my stepdads death. It’s something that I’m thinking about daily. I can’t believe it’s been a year already. My mom is having a really difficult time with it, of course, and that makes it even harder. Dealing with your own grief can be intense but adding someone else’s too it is almost more than I can handle. We were sure that we’d have a baby growing in my body before he passed away.. but we failed. That damn cancer is so unpredictable! Here’s hoping that we get through this holiday without me falling into a total depressive funk.
lezbemoms said,
December 20, 2011 at 8:33 pm
We understand the “depressive funk” around here. Shorty’s dad died three years ago this past thanksgiving and her grandmother (who raised her) died the same day as your stepdad. We thought the same thing, about being pregnant before she passed. Sad times. Hugs and comfort- live in the light, knowing he would want you to be happy.
lara said,
December 20, 2011 at 10:23 pm
To me, if you’re not into religious stuff, I don’t know why you would feel obligated to make your child/ren take part in it. Taking your kids to church doesn’t make you a good mother. Just let them know that religious options are out there, and if they are interested in and want to go to church, take them. If they’re not, don’t. I’m not religious at all, but I think the best/most important part of religion is ethics and morals, but those aren’t exclusive to religion, and I think are mostly learned at home.
Just my two cents :]
excitabletraveler said,
December 21, 2011 at 8:44 am
I think that each parent ought to raise their child with good morals, judgement, and ability to analyze the world. If you don’t believe in the church, don’t take your kids there. They’ll sense the insincerity and maybe develop a negative association. On the same token, if your child decides they want to attend religious services, I’d encourage you to help that happen.
Depressive funk – simply remind yourself of all the love you still have, and cherish those positive memories you have of him.
isassmallobsessions said,
December 21, 2011 at 11:32 am
I’m sorry about your stepdad’s anniversary coming up. It’s tough, especially with all of the added holiday stress–be sure to take care of yourself!
And I agree–no need to be religious if you aren’t just for the kids’ sake. I would recommend being open to letting them explore without judging (my sister and I went to lots of churches with friends, synagogues, etc, when we were little–I ended up somewhat religious and she never did, but we both got to make up our own minds). But Christmas is a perfectly nice secular holiday, too, anymore.
Amanda said,
December 28, 2011 at 4:41 pm
Kids ask what holidays are about. Ours have learned that many of the big celebrated holidays are Pagan celebrations that were tweaked into Christian holidays to help the transition of converting to be easier. We aren’t religious either, so we just kinda share the history that we are aware of. Ian (the 11 yr old) calls Easter “Zombie Jesus Day” because of the resurrection. Oh, kids!
LoveshackBaby said,
December 29, 2011 at 4:48 pm
I like this kind of celebrating. I call it Zombie Jesus Day too! ha ha ha